Thursday, January 11, 2007

This ain't Kansas

So, I work in retail (you all know where but I happen to know that the divisonal manager types in the name of my store and reads blogs with those words... I'd rather not.)

So, I work in retail and we were having a visit from the regional manager and he got a call from one of his store managers (still with me?).
The store manager said, " I got a call from the police... in Bermuda. Turns out someone bought some stuff from us and took it home, stuffed the boxes full of drugs, and shiped it off to Bermuda. Aparently the man who shipped them is suggesting that the drugs must have been in there when he bought it."

Regional Manager, "Oh, were the drugs there when he bought it?"

"No. But now they want to interview us."

So I thought this was the coolest story ever! It was 10:15 in the morning and we were talking about drugs stuffed in our boxes! Sweet! And my Regional Manager's biggest concern was, and, I quote:

"Who ships drugs OUT of the United States? So you pay top dollar for the drugs then pay a bundle for shipping and then send em off to Bermuda? And let's not discount the fact that it was the Bermuda Police that we're talking to, which means we can assume they made it safely out of the US no problem!"

So I told my RM that this was by far the coolest stuff I'd ever been in to (not that it had a thing to do with me, but I was in the room). I was once told when I worked in Cali that a store had been hiding pornography in the celing tiles of the men's bathroom and had been doing so for years untill one of the guys took one of the girls into the bathroom and showed her and somehow they were busted within the week. That's when I learned girls just don't like Pornography. Go fig.

So not one to be one-uped, my RM says, "Well, this isn't as bad as the time I got called to come to a store and take care of the dead body in the dumpster."

JENNY MAC! A dead body! One time in Orem we had the mystery of who was dumping old Chinese food in our dumpster (so you don't sit up at night, it was the Chinese resterant that shared our parking lot). But I had never known the dark side of retail and it is darker here than anywhere else I've worked.

It was just another moment in which I loved this city and knew that we were out of here when Lindsay's school is done. Give me the mystery of who left a Burlington Coat Factory shopping cart in our store over a corpses any day of the week!


Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Happy New Year!

Here's to a productive 2007 -- one of our goals is to post more often with bigger, faster, funnier stories and occurrences, and thus recover our readership.

Oh, and not to brag or anything, but we got tickets to Paris for Christmas! We're hitting France, Switzerland, and Italy, so any recommendations of must-sees, must-eats, or must-dos would be greatly appreciated!

Coming next: Bumb Fights, Part Deux...anticipate it, baby.